Gifted, twice exceptional, and spiky: it’s not a brag

What gifted means

The National Association for Gifted Children (NAGC) says children with gifts and talents “perform, or have the capability to perform, at higher levels compared to others of the same age, experience, and environment in one or more domains,” and that they need changes to their education to learn and grow. NAGC also points out that gifted kids come from every background and that “not all gifted children look or act alike.”

That word “capability” matters. A gifted child isn’t always the one with straight A’s. Some are bored, some are anxious, and some are working so hard to cover a struggle that nobody sees what they can do.

Another definition that many parents find closer to home comes from a group of psychologists and educators called the Columbus Group, in 1991:

“Giftedness is asynchronous development in which advanced cognitive abilities and heightened intensity combine to create inner experiences and awareness that are qualitatively different from the norm.”

Asynchronous development just means growing at different speeds in different areas. A child can reason like someone much older, handle frustration like someone their own age, and write by hand like someone younger, all on the same afternoon. That mismatch is a big part of why gifted kids can be so hard to parent and so easy to misunderstand.

Why it’s not a brag, and why it’s hard

Say “gifted” out loud and many people hear “my kid is better than yours.” So a lot of parents stop saying it. In one study of parents of highly gifted children, published in Gifted Child Quarterly in 2024, parents described feeling isolated and hesitant to talk about their children’s abilities. In another study from the University of Georgia, about 1 in 3 gifted students said they had felt stigmatized for being gifted.

Meanwhile, the day-to-day can look like this:

• Intensity. Psychologist James Webb called intensity “the most universal, yet most overlooked, characteristic of gifted children.” Big questions, big feelings, big reactions to things other kids shrug off.
• A mind ahead of the heart. A child who understands news about wars or climate change long before they have the emotional tools to carry it.
• Never learning how to struggle. If school has always been easy, the first truly hard thing can feel like a catastrophe. Some kids would rather not try than try and fail.
• Boredom that looks like behavior. A child sitting through lessons they mastered long ago may tune out, argue, or melt down.
• Hard to find their people. Kids their age may not share their interests, and older kids may not share their maturity.
• “They’ll be fine.” Gifted kids are easy to overlook for support, because people assume being smart is enough.

None of that is a complaint about your child. It’s just true that “gifted” describes how a child is wired, and wiring that’s different from most kids’ takes more understanding from the adults around them, not less.

A note on “overexcitabilities.” You may read that gifted kids have five “overexcitabilities” (an idea from psychologist Kazimierz Dąbrowski). It’s a popular way to describe intensity, but the research is mixed. A 2016 review found only small to medium differences, and a 2026 review warned against using overexcitabilities to identify giftedness. If the words help you understand your child, use them. Just don’t treat them as a test.

Twice exceptional (2E)

Twice exceptional, or 2E, means a child is gifted and has a disability: for example autism, ADHD, dyslexia or another learning disability, anxiety, or a physical disability. The definition many schools use, from the Council for Exceptional Children’s gifted division, says 2E individuals “evidence exceptional ability and disability, which results in a unique set of circumstances.”

The same definition explains why 2E kids are so often missed. The strength and the struggle can hide each other in three ways:

2E kids may perform below, at, or above grade level, and grades alone won’t tell you which kind of support they need.

Thrice exceptional (3E)

Thrice exceptional, or 3E, is a newer term, and there isn’t one agreed definition. Here’s how different experts use it:

• Gifted, disabled, and from a group that has been pushed to the margins. Researcher Joy Lawson Davis describes 3E as being gifted, having a learning disability or other disability, and being a culturally diverse member of a socially oppressed group. This is the most common use in research.
• Gifted, with a learning difference, plus another identity that adds challenges. Kristina Henry Collins’ model, shared by SENG, looks at how giftedness and disability overlap with other identities, such as race or income, that change how a child is seen and served.
• A wider net. Some clinicians use 3E whenever another layer, like economic hardship, being LGBTQ+, or being an English learner, adds to the complexity of being 2E.

You’ll also see some parents online use 3E to mean gifted plus two disabilities. We didn’t find a research source that uses it that way, so ask what someone means if it comes up.

Why it matters: the research is clear that kids who are 2E and from groups that are already under-identified are the most likely to be missed. Tennessee’s own data shows Black and Hispanic students are underrepresented in gifted services, and a 2024 study found that being a boy, being a student of color, or coming from a low-income family made a 2E child less likely to be identified as gifted.

Gifted and neurodivergent

Honest answer: nobody knows exactly, and the numbers you’ll find online vary a lot.

• A long-quoted estimate from the National Education Association (2006) puts the number of 2E students in the U.S. around 360,000, often described as 2 to 5% of gifted kids.
• State counts range from almost none to about 10% of gifted students, which says more about how differently states look than about kids.
• A 2024 study using a large national sample of U.S. children estimated that students with disabilities should make up about 1 in 9 kids in gifted programs, far more than are actually identified.

Autism. Gifted and autistic kids can share traits, like deep focus on interests, sensory sensitivity, and preferring older kids or adults. A 2022 review in Gifted Child Quarterly said estimates of how often the two go together “should be interpreted with caution.” A child can be either, or both, and only a careful evaluation can sort it out.

ADHD. This one cuts both ways. Gifted intensity, impatience, and high energy can be mistaken for ADHD, and a gifted child’s strengths can hide real ADHD for years. An evaluator who knows giftedness can tell the difference.

Learning disabilities. Dyslexia and dysgraphia (trouble with handwriting and getting thoughts onto paper) can hide for years behind strong verbal skills. A child who talks like a college student and can’t get a sentence onto paper is a classic picture. Our dyslexia guide covers what Tennessee schools have to do.

Anxiety and depression. You may have seen a 2018 study of Mensa members that reported much higher rates of anxiety, mood disorders, ADHD, and autism. Other researchers have pointed out that people who choose to join Mensa aren’t a typical sample. A study of about 261,500 people in the UK found high intelligence was not linked to more mental health conditions, and a 2024 review of many studies found gifted people overall had about the same or slightly lower anxiety and depression. So “gifted” doesn’t mean “anxious.” But your individual child can absolutely struggle, especially if they are 2E and their needs have been missed.

Spiky profiles

Most kids are generalists. They’re a little stronger at some things and a little weaker at others, but their skills sit fairly close together. A child with a spiky profile has much bigger differences: very high peaks in some areas and real valleys in others. You’ll hear the term a lot with autism, ADHD, and 2E kids.

What it can look like: a child who can explain how the digestive system works from start to finish but can’t find their shoes; who reads far above grade level but needs help with buttons; who solves a puzzle in seconds and takes an hour to write two sentences about it.

Why the valleys are hard: people tend to judge a child by their peaks. “You’re so smart, you could do this if you tried” lands hard on a kid who truly can’t yet. And the child often knows exactly how far behind they are in their weak areas, which can be painful.

What the testing research says. Gifted kids often score highest on reasoning and verbal skills, and lower, though often still average or above, on working memory (holding information in mind while using it) and processing speed. In a 2026 study of 390 gifted children, 73% had a gap of 23 points or more between some of their index scores. One child scored 150 in verbal skills and 66 in processing speed, which pulled their full-scale IQ down to 117.

That’s why NAGC said in 2018 that schools should not require the full-scale IQ for gifted programs, and should accept strength-based scores like the General Ability Index (GAI), which leaves out working memory and processing speed. It’s also why a spiky profile is worth a closer look, not a shrug: a big gap can be a sign of a learning disability, ADHD, or another difference that deserves support.

Gifted services in Tennessee schools

Tennessee does something many states don’t: it treats Intellectually Gifted as a special education category. That means a gifted child is evaluated through special education and served through an IEP, with the same parent rights as any other IEP.

The Tennessee Department of Education defines intellectually gifted as a child whose intellectual abilities, creativity, and potential are so outstanding that their needs go beyond what general education offers, it affects their education, and they need specially designed instruction or support.

Under Tennessee’s eligibility standards, the evaluation looks at three areas:

• Cognitive ability: scores at the 94th percentile or above.
• Educational performance: how your child is doing in school.
• Creativity and/or characteristics of giftedness.

Results are weighed together on a state scoring grid, and the team has to show how giftedness affects your child’s education. The standards name twice-exceptional students as a group to consider carefully, and suggest other measures, like nonverbal tests or a General Ability Index, for students who are often underidentified.

Good to know:

• The state category covers intellectual giftedness only, not talent in the arts or a single subject. Districts can choose to run other advanced programs.
• A child can qualify both as Intellectually Gifted and under another disability category, like autism or a specific learning disability. The state says a child with a dual diagnosis that includes gifted must be treated as a child with a disability, including for discipline protections.
• Murfreesboro City Schools runs its Gifted Program through its special education department and follows the state criteria.
• Rutherford County Schools screens all second graders for gifted services and also accepts referrals from teachers and parents, according to a Rutherford County Schools page describing its high school gifted program. Ask your school for the current process.

As with any special education evaluation, put your request in writing. Our IEP and 504 guide walks through timelines and how to prepare.

At home

From parents who have been there, not a clinical plan:

• Expect their age, not their IQ, when it comes to feelings. A child who reasons like a teenager still needs the comfort and patience you’d give any kid their age.
• Feed the interest. Deep interests are often where gifted and 2E kids feel most themselves. Library trips, documentaries, and a grown-up who will listen go a long way.
• Make room for safe struggle. Something that’s hard for them, with low stakes, like a new instrument or a tricky game, helps them learn that not knowing yet is okay.
• Name the valleys without shame. “Your brain is really fast at ideas and slower at getting them onto paper. Both are true, and we can work with that.”
• Look for friends by interest, not age. Clubs, classes, and camps built around what they love can be easier than a room full of same-age kids.
• Find your own people. You don’t owe anyone proof that this is hard.

Questions to ask the school or evaluator

• How does our school identify students for Intellectually Gifted services, and can I request an evaluation in writing today?
• Will the evaluation look at both giftedness and any other concerns, like attention, reading, writing, or social communication?
• If my child’s index scores are far apart, will you consider the General Ability Index or another strength-based score?
• Does the evaluator have experience with twice-exceptional (2E) students?
• If my child qualifies in more than one category, how will one IEP cover both the challenge they need and the support they need?
• What does gifted service actually look like here: how often, with whom, and in what setting?
• How will you make sure my child’s strengths aren’t the reason their struggles get overlooked?